Thursday, August 28, 2008

Getting Older (and Better)

Had lunch with my parents and one of their friends the other day. Mom is 84, Dad is 85 and Friend is undecided. (Or at least not talking- but I'm pretty sure she is in her mid 80s, also.) They were all very interesting- Friend travels and keeps up with lots of acquaintances and the parents have a more active social life than the Prince of a husband and I do. Makes me wonder just what it is that keeps some people active and young while others seem old before their time. The common denominator with most of the active older folks I know, my parents included, is that they make a point of having younger friends. Now "younger" is all relative- in their case it means 50s or 60s. But I figure this works well for me. Being an older mother I tend to hang out with the parents of my kid's friends who are for the most part 10 years younger than I am. Or more. I just found out I am the same age as Belle's best friend's grandmother. Eek!
So Dad is complaining about how he "never expected he would be this old". He had a stroke last year and has recovered 95%- but he is still mad about that 5% that's gone. I'm not sure what he thought the alternative would be but I suggested that if he was really that upset, he should get himself a Harley, blow off the helmet and just go for it. Seems every day in the obituaries there is at least one person who died doing "what they loved best, riding their motorcycle." Although I actually suspect that part of the reason that he is doing as well as he is might be related to his attitude. He's just not interested in becoming old. And come to think of it- neither am I.
I am at the crossroads of getting older. I feel great. I look pretty good. I'm strong with no physical complaints. BUT! Those wrinkles have given me a permanently grumpy look so I confess to indulging in a little Botox a few times a year. Just to get rid of the lines between my eyebrows. And now my hairline seems to be receding- which really stinks for a woman. (It probably really stinks for a guy, too, but at least there are lots of you in the same boat.) So I am trying a bit of Rogaine which my nice "cosmetic dermatologist" pointed out was for the rest of my natural life or all that nice new hair would just fall right back out. And what comes next? I would be amazing if I had a little bit of a facelift- but I also wouldn't look 52 or maybe even 42. Would I have a 40 something face on a 50 something body? That always looks odd. It is like 60 year old women having implants- these bright and perky breasts on an otherwise saggy body. Even if it is a FIT body, it's an older body. (I've always thought they should make "older women" implants. Ones that come with a bit of softness built in to them. ) So- keep hanging in there doing a bit here and a bit there? Or go with the often appealing (and often appalling) idea of just giving up? Or do something major? Or buy the Harley? Just don't know.
For now I guess I will keep sticking my fingers in the dike- fixing things here and there. Hopefully, the whole dam thing won't go. In the meantime, life is good.

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